18 Jul 6 Common Fears Birth Mothers Have About an Open Adoption
1. My Child Will Resent Me for Placing them for Adoption
It’s natural to think that your child may resent you for putting them up for adoption, but the reality is that you are choosing adoption because you believe adoption is in their best interest. Parenting is difficult, and sometimes people aren’t ready to take that step, especially after an unplanned pregnancy. When your child is old enough to understand, you and/or their adoptive parents can explain your decision, and they will end up appreciating you for putting them first.
2. I’m Being Selfish for Choosing Adoption
You aren’t being selfish; you are being thoughtful and responsible. By choosing adoption, you are giving your child an opportunity to grow up in a safe and nurturing home with parents who will look after them and give them what they deserve. It isn’t selfish; it is selfless! You made a difficult choice in order to provide your child with what they need in life. Adoption is one of the least selfish choices you could have made – don’t let this misplaced guilt discourage you.
3. I’m Not a Real Mom
Mothers make great sacrifices for their children. Don’t discredit your tough decision by thinking you aren’t a real mother. It’s the opposite – you are the prime example of a mother. You placed your child’s needs first and above all else. You may think putting your child up for adoption means giving away your right to call yourself a mother, but this isn’t the case. Not only are you a birth mother who made a tough choice in your child’s best interest but choosing an open adoption could mean you still play a role in your baby’s life.
4. My Child May be Placed in a Home That Doesn’t Love Them
Cradle of Hope works tirelessly to ensure that adoptive families are fit to give your child what they need. You can rest assured that adoption requirements in DC, Maryland and Virginia are highly regulated and result in only the best for your baby. The adoptive family that will care for your baby will be one that has thought about this decision long and hard and is ready, both emotionally and financially, to support and love your child as their own. This is not a decision that is taken lightly, and many of these families often turn to adoption because they want a child but are unable to conceive one themselves. They know what they are entering into and will welcome your baby with open arms.
5. People Will Judge Me For Choosing Adoption
Those who judge birth parents are often those who haven’t walked in your shoes. It’s impossible to understand someone’s reasoning without having been in the same situation. Pay no attention to those who want to shame or embarrass you. There is no shame in acknowledging limitations and making a choice that benefits everyone involved. Don’t let the judgment of others affect you. Stay strong and confident in your decision because making this choice makes you stronger than all those who judge you!
6. The Adoption Process is Overwhelming, and I Have To Do It Alone
If you are thinking, “I want to put my child up for adoption” or “Quiero dar a mi bebe en adopción,” know that we can help you build an adoption plan that is right for you. Cradle of Hope will work to calm your fears and make sure your child ends up in the best home. Although the adoption process can feel overwhelming, you are never alone in your journey. Cradle of Hope will guide you through each step of the adoption process and will make this experience as stress-free as possible.
Why You Shouldn’t Let These Fears Control You
Fear is natural, so you shouldn’t feel weak for having these thoughts. However, it is important to know that there is no need for you to give in to these fears. While adoption can be daunting for a birth mother, Cradle of Hope will be with you and make sure you are not alone! Please
don’t hesitate to reach out to us at 301-905-9999. Don’t allow fear to keep you from making the right choice for both you and your baby