More things to think about

Why do some pregnant women choose adoption?

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  • Most women who choose adoption are putting their baby’s needs ahead of their own.
  • They want their child to have everything they are not able to provide their child.
  • Most women want a stable home for their child, so their child has parents who wants to be involved.
  • They want their child to be able to go to college and not struggle to have the basic comforts of life.
  • They want their child to have an extended family of grandparents and aunts and uncles who can provide a good, supportive, healthy family for their child.
  • They want their child to grow up in a great environment and with loving parents who are ready to become parents.
  • Many women realize that they could struggle and maybe make it through life with their child but that isn’t what is best for their child.
  • Many women want to make sure their child is not raised in an abusive or negligent environment.
  • Many women don’t want their child to go into state foster care.
  • Many women realize their limitations and want a better life for their child.
  • Many women don’t want to try and raise a child with a birthfather who is not supportive financially, too controlling, or says he will be involved but doesn’t follow through, etc.
  • Sometimes the relationship between the birth father and birth mother is very poor and always has been. Most pregnant women realize that zebras rarely change their stripes and therefore don’t believe false promises from the birth fathers who often claim to have changed their ways. These women know their child will be better off with a mom and dad who want to be together and who want to be a mom and dad.
  • Many women don’t want their child subjected to alcohol or drug abuse from either themselves or the birth father.

What kind of adoption is right for you?

  • Do you want a closed, semi-open or open adoption?
  • Do you want to meet the adoptive family?
  • After the adoption, would you like updates on how your child is progressing?
  • Do you want the adoptive family to be with you at the hospital?



What kind of family do you want for your baby?

  • Is religion important to you?
  • Does age matter?
  • Years married?
  • Are their jobs important to you?
  • Do you want a local family?
  • Do you want to know about their extended families?
  • Would you consider a single mom?
  • Would you consider a same sex couple?

Further questions to ask yourself:

  • Have you shared your adoption plans with anyone?
  • If yes, how do they feel about it?
  • Is anyone not supportive of your adoption plans? How important are their opinions? Do you need help educating these people or
  • learning strategies to minimize their affect on your feelings?
  • Have you thought about what is best for your baby? Have you thought about how bright your child’s future can be through adoption?
  • Have you thought about your future goals?
  • Do you have other children already? If yes, you need to consider that by choosing adoption you will have more time, energy, and resources to devote to them.